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Archive for the ‘chicks’ Category

Are you sick of cute animals yet?

Thursday, August 4th, 2011

Too bad.  We’re not.  How is it possible that the tone of titsandballs.org is still so bitter even though we are surrounded by cute animals? It’s fuckin’ hot.  But, right now it is playtime for two lucky chicks!

They also enjoy reading about feminism in the New Yorker.  And, picking lint off the bed!

That article really tuckered them out.  Ruh roh.  It’s all fun and games until something poops.

Knock Knock…

Sunday, July 31st, 2011

Who’s there?

Nobody

Nobody who?

Nobody who’s not Tits and Balls, bunch of jerks, everybody else fled the scene, said it’s too hot. Just go North, whatever, we don’t need you, have fun in Maine, Seattle, Denver, Austin, it’s still fucking hot in Austin anyways, and isn’t there a heat wave in the Midwest? Roast, I say. We’re fine, thanks. We have plans. And fans. We’re busy- too busy, in fact. We have got a LOT going on here. So with no further ado, please allow me to introduce you to our NEW friends, true companions, won’t/can’t leave us, best summer ever, New Orleans August 2011 4Lyfe!!!

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You’ve met these little ones already, but let me tell you they just get cuter every day! Honestly, I swear they are half penguin. Check out their new digs:

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And here’s Buddy, doing his best to beat the heat. More about Buddy and his amorous escapades later.

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Um, this is our Venus Flytrap Seed. Turns out they are quite finicky, and can take 3-4 years to reach adult size, that is if you can even get them started. Given that this seed came free from a directionless packet via a yard sale and is god only knows how old and/or driedup and totally nonviable, well, we’ll see.

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We’re also going to start brewing beer, but we’ll probably drink it all before you out-of-towners get back. Sorry.

Well it’s been a little while…

Thursday, July 28th, 2011

Oh, hello there, fans. Yes, I hear you. I admit it; you’re starting to get my attention. Your shrill clamor is reaching fever pitch and I can no longer ignore your pleas. And you are absolutely within your rights to be upset. I could offer you excuses: Blah, the internet connection, blah, we’ve been so busy, blah, the heat, the heat…but I’ll refrain. Over the course of our nearly 4-year run, Titsandballs.org has offered up our share of excuses, and of promises. Accompanied by, I admit, very little of either follow-through or accountability. There was Hello World, back in July of ‘o8-we promised you the moon. September 2008 we offered even more with Tits and Balls v2 is Coming. Then there was the postmature, and yet also premature, Welcome to titsandballs.org in May of ‘o9 . Calling All Webmasters was nothing but a spiteful jab at our erstwhile techie, and I’m ashamed of it. So I understand that it may be with some trepidation and doubt that you, our loyal readers, read the newest news: We’re back! And better than ever! With a game plan! I’ve developed a 3-prong approach to make sure that this time, we stay on track. So here’s what we’ll be focusing on:

I. Recipes: Stir-fry is so last year. This summer, it’s all about CARBS, CARBS, CARBS. Bread pudding, french toast, pizza bagels, you name it! Pickles and cocksicles will also be covered.

II. Animalia, in which we chronicle the amusing pitfalls and daring escapades of the newest members of the extended titsandballs family: 9 adorable bantam chicks and a dirty old fleabitten uncle of a found dog.

III. Chronic Funderemployment- this will encompass job as well as non-job adventures not including those already covered by “recipes” and “animalia”

We also plan to supplement our witty and perceptive prose with lots of heartwarming photos. A picture’s worth a thousand words!


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