Squash Pizza
First, make dough. This is my Italian grandmother’s recipe (seriously). Mix 2 2/3 cups flour, 1 tsp salt, 1 TBSP olive oil. Add 1 TBSP yeast bloomed in 1 cup warm water. Let rise for some time. While the dough is rising, turn on the oven (450ish) and put in a halved squash of some sort.
Stretch dough- should make two pans. If you mess up here, it will be catastrophic. If having a dinner party, only let your most even-tempered friends participate in dough-stretching.
********A Tits Thought Sidebar*********
While you are stretching the dough, contemplate what you would be like if you parents were Ayn Rand and David Foster Wallace. You might also wish to contemplate the circumstances under which Ayn Rand and David Foster Wallace would conceive a child. Submissions welcome.
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Now that your dough is stretched, it is time to put things on it. Take out the squash (remember the squash? It’s in the oven), and cut it into strips or mash it up or something. Put squash on dough. Drizzle with olive oil. Add a handful of chopped fresh garlic, generous amounts of dried thyme (you could probably use fresh if you have it), black pepper, and freshly grated parm or asiago or comparable cheese. Put in oven (still 450-ish) and bake until done.
Top with some sort of balsamic glaze/reduction. I was lucky enough to find a bottle labeled “Balsamic Glaze” in the cupboard that the previous renters had left behind. I heated it on the stove and added some honey, just so that I could feel useful. If your previous renters didn’t leave glaze, I infer from “reduction” that you cook it on the stove for a long time, perhaps adding honey at some point. You could also google it.
Enjoy pizza!
Moral of the Recipe: When cooking, it is important never to become frenzied. When you find yourself panicking, try to remember that you are in your kitchen, and settle down.